I was hoping for better results. It is now time for me to move from denial toacceptance.
Since May 3rd, after hearing the initial diagnosis from my Surgeon at Oshawa General Hospital, Garth and I have taken the time to absorb and process it all on an emotional level. We have also been in waiting mode.
Waiting....... for the first appointment with Dr.W. at Mount Sinai for another assessment.
Waiting....... for further CT Scans and MRIs.
Waiting........for the results of the CT Scans and MRIs.
Waiting....... to meet with the Oncologist who would tell us what kind of treatmentregimen will be required.
The doctors at Mount Sinai are still waiting...... to receive the patholgy sample from OGH and have expressed their frustation at the delay in receiving this as they are not able to give me a definitive diagnosis of what type of Cancer it is.
The doctors at Mount Sinai are still waiting...... to receive the patholgy sample from OGH and have expressed their frustation at the delay in receiving this as they are not able to give me a definitive diagnosis of what type of Cancer it is.
The "waiting" is one of the most difficult things to deal with.
Waiting.... to get more information.
Waiting....to find out what happens next.
Waiting....to "live"again.
The MRI showed clearly a tumor between my left eye and the bone in my nose. It is localized to that area in my ethmoid sinuses. It is either Squamous cell carcinoma or Mucoepidermoid carcinoma. Both will mostlikely require 5-6 weeks of daily radiation appointments to shrink the tumor. Dr.W. explained to me that there is a whole floor at Princess Margaret Hospital dedicated to the physics of radiation and how they target the beam as not to damage healthy tissue. How cool is that? He stated that surgery may be required afterwards to ensure total removal. He is optimistic that they can save my vision, but the radiation may cause me to get cateracts early. He is also optimistic that the surgery can be done intranasally which was quite a relief as some of the surgeries for paranasal sinus cancer can be quite disfiguring. The tumor board will be meeting next Tuesday, which is a minimum of 12 doctors that convene to discuss a specific and concrete treatment strategy based on the findings of the pathology report. In the meantime I have ongoing appointments for bloodwork, a hearing test at Toronto General and a dental appointment at Princess Margaret as the radiation may affect both my hearing and my teeth.
So as I continue to wait.....life still happens.....now it just happens between medical appointments, not during them.
My life in the next few months will be filled with lots of laughter and love, walks in the park, playing with the dog, watching my favorite movies, reading novels I’ve always meant to read, and learning to let my friends and family take care of me while I try to take care of them too.